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I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by. You live and learn. At any rate, you live. Nothing travels faster than the speed of light...except bad news, which obeys its own special laws. I like a woman with a head on her shoulders. I hate necks. As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say? I want to be for her what I could never be for you. A word to the wise ain't necessary. It's the stupid ones that need the advice. What do women want? I think that women want men to stop asking dumb questions like that. Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law? The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think. You know when you're telling these little stories? Have a point. Women have choices, and men have responsibilities. All I've ever wanted was an honest week's pay for an honest day's work. I believe entertainment can aspire to be art, but if you set out to make art you’re an idiot. You know that look women get when they want sex? ...me neither. All of life's riddles are answered in the movies. |